If you could live your life over…

Hi Friends,

This is a short piece that was sent to me by one of my friends and clients Nandi Shastry, CEO of Brainy Betty (www.brainybetty.com).

Dr. Anthony Campolo, Professor of Sociology, Eastern College, St. Davids, Pennsylvania, shares the results of a survey where 50 people 95 years and older were asked: “If you could live your life over what would you do differently?” The answers surprised me. These old folks said that if they could live their lives over they would…

1. Reflect more.

These seniors said they would take the time to think about what was going on and live their lives along well-thought-out priorities. They would contemplate the meaning of life, family, work and much more.

2. Risk more.

These wonderful aged human beings said they would have taken more chances in life. If they could re-live their lives they wouldn’t be so scared to take risks. They would have developed more courage to venture out of their comfort zones.

3. Do things that would outlast them.

They wanted to know that their lives counted for something, that long after they left this world, somehow their impact would live on. We all can learn something from these people about setting goals.

Let’s take a moment to consider what they said as you set the course for your life.

To Having It All,

John

 

Comments

  1. How true! I think it ws Mark Victor Hansen that pointed out that Maslow actually had it wrong, our inner needs are to live,love,laugh and leave a legacy! What more do we need? Luv Ya All, Justin.

  2. How true! I think it ws Mark Victor Hansen that pointed out that Maslow actually had it wrong, our inner needs are to live,love,laugh and leave a legacy! What more do we need? Luv Ya All, Justin.

  3. My dad passed away 15 months ago. I was privileged enough to spend the last days with him. I will always remember him saying “Don’t look back too long” Keep looking forward. Look for what you want. There is nothing to fear. Dad was right !

  4. My dad passed away 15 months ago. I was privileged enough to spend the last days with him. I will always remember him saying “Don’t look back too long” Keep looking forward. Look for what you want. There is nothing to fear. Dad was right !

  5. So true isn’t it, the things that really matter the most are often not what folks invest in. Thanks for taking time to share this.

    t

  6. So true isn’t it, the things that really matter the most are often not what folks invest in. Thanks for taking time to share this.

    t

  7. Margaret says:

    If I only knew then what I know now! I’m sure I’d be living a totally different life…

  8. Margaret says:

    If I only knew then what I know now! I’m sure I’d be living a totally different life…

  9. in 1982 I wrote a song and named it “Time Flies”. The first line in the song is:”When you look at the past through the eyes of your mind you will see Time Flies” If you want to listen to the tune its at Prairiemusicstudios.com. Just click on the picture of the clock and adjust the volume eith the slider bar. I Love You All. Mike Riley

  10. in 1982 I wrote a song and named it “Time Flies”. The first line in the song is:”When you look at the past through the eyes of your mind you will see Time Flies” If you want to listen to the tune its at Prairiemusicstudios.com. Just click on the picture of the clock and adjust the volume eith the slider bar. I Love You All. Mike Riley

  11. i second that,john

  12. i second that,john

  13. In a recent survey which asked “If you died today, how fulfilling a life would you have led?” a mere 28% answered “very”.

    What a shame!

    Bob Proctor also says that many people tiptoe through life hoping to make it safely to death. But we don’t have the opportunity to rewind or start over. This is it!

    So we really need to take note of this post and more important – take ACTION to ensure that we don’t live a life of regrets.

    Nickolove

  14. In a recent survey which asked “If you died today, how fulfilling a life would you have led?” a mere 28% answered “very”.

    What a shame!

    Bob Proctor also says that many people tiptoe through life hoping to make it safely to death. But we don’t have the opportunity to rewind or start over. This is it!

    So we really need to take note of this post and more important – take ACTION to ensure that we don’t live a life of regrets.

    Nickolove

  15. You’re a great teacher in everyone of these areas and are surely congruent

    Reflect more:
    It’s all about the small things in life that lead to large success. Reflecting on being grateful and past successes surely have an impact on the amount of confidence we have for taking action on our goals and dreams. Life is awesome in so many ways, taking time to stop and reflect with an attitude of gratitude is a great way to raise your vibration.

    Risk More:
    Everyone in this world wants homeostasis right John?! It’s a struggle between spirit wanting to expand and our brains wanting to keep us in our comfort zone. It’s those unfounded fears that stir up from the amygdala that keep people from progressing forward. Feel the fear and do it anyway. The key with risk is not abolishing fear, its managing it. Fear is our basis for emotion and without fear we couldn’t survive. If you didn’t fear anything why would you ever stop at a red light? There is always a certain degree of uncertainty and excitement involved with risk, and the world uncertainly is simply an adult word for fear. Fear and excitement trigger the exact same parts of our brains. They are no different.

    Do things that would outlast them:
    One of the best things I’ve heard from Scott is to create long term value. When people begin to understand it’s not about them at all, it about serving others, that’s when you’re creating a passionate and purpose driven life while making an impact on this little blue planet. I love your theory John, you’re happy with your lifestyle, the vacations you take, the house the live in, the car you drive. The only reason you intend to earn more money it help more people around the world. Thats how our intentions in this world have an impact that lives on.

    Thanks for sharing John!

    Ryan Yokome
    http://www.evolvedtrader.com/

  16. You’re a great teacher in everyone of these areas and are surely congruent

    Reflect more:
    It’s all about the small things in life that lead to large success. Reflecting on being grateful and past successes surely have an impact on the amount of confidence we have for taking action on our goals and dreams. Life is awesome in so many ways, taking time to stop and reflect with an attitude of gratitude is a great way to raise your vibration.

    Risk More:
    Everyone in this world wants homeostasis right John?! It’s a struggle between spirit wanting to expand and our brains wanting to keep us in our comfort zone. It’s those unfounded fears that stir up from the amygdala that keep people from progressing forward. Feel the fear and do it anyway. The key with risk is not abolishing fear, its managing it. Fear is our basis for emotion and without fear we couldn’t survive. If you didn’t fear anything why would you ever stop at a red light? There is always a certain degree of uncertainty and excitement involved with risk, and the world uncertainly is simply an adult word for fear. Fear and excitement trigger the exact same parts of our brains. They are no different.

    Do things that would outlast them:
    One of the best things I’ve heard from Scott is to create long term value. When people begin to understand it’s not about them at all, it about serving others, that’s when you’re creating a passionate and purpose driven life while making an impact on this little blue planet. I love your theory John, you’re happy with your lifestyle, the vacations you take, the house the live in, the car you drive. The only reason you intend to earn more money it help more people around the world. Thats how our intentions in this world have an impact that lives on.

    Thanks for sharing John!

    Ryan Yokome
    http://www.evolvedtrader.com/

  17. I agree with the seniors that said they would reflect more. I have purposely chosen to make one of my life goals…to live to be 100 years old and have the president of the US at the time to “come to me” and present my award for living 100 years. Also none of my children have had children yet, so I have to stick around a lot longer for them to get around to giving me grandchildren.
    I think we should all want to say “yes” we would change things, and one of the changes could be to join forces to discover how to live healthier and happier than we do now so “we can live longer”…. although I find my life wonderful, I am always looking for more ways to be happy so time becomes more important.

  18. I agree with the seniors that said they would reflect more. I have purposely chosen to make one of my life goals…to live to be 100 years old and have the president of the US at the time to “come to me” and present my award for living 100 years. Also none of my children have had children yet, so I have to stick around a lot longer for them to get around to giving me grandchildren.
    I think we should all want to say “yes” we would change things, and one of the changes could be to join forces to discover how to live healthier and happier than we do now so “we can live longer”…. although I find my life wonderful, I am always looking for more ways to be happy so time becomes more important.

  19. Kieran Revell says:

    So many of us meander through life, hoping to have a smooth run, dodge any hurdles and arrive at the other end as unscathed as possible. I feel a great deal of sorrow for those who leave life as they have lived it: Devoid of excitement, challenge, passion, commitment, wisdom, truth, trust, gratitude, love, humility and success.

    Individuals can never hope to fill their lives with abundance, if they never face challenges: It’s the problems which confront us in our daily worlds, that give us the drive and vision to look beyond the constraints to find the keys to success.

    Hindsight is a wonderful tool, though it can never help us to achieve, if we do not learn lessons. Every day should be filled with energy, passion, compassion, drive, hope, commitment, wisdom, truth, trust, gratitude, faith, love, patience, understanding, generosity, persistence, determination and self-belief.

    Never look back with regret, but always forward with optimism and hope. As long as we learn to like, love, respect and believe in ourselves, all things are possible. What others say about us has some importance in our lives: What we believe about ourselves is paramount to our growth and development.

    Take care.

    Kieran

  20. Kieran Revell says:

    So many of us meander through life, hoping to have a smooth run, dodge any hurdles and arrive at the other end as unscathed as possible. I feel a great deal of sorrow for those who leave life as they have lived it: Devoid of excitement, challenge, passion, commitment, wisdom, truth, trust, gratitude, love, humility and success.

    Individuals can never hope to fill their lives with abundance, if they never face challenges: It’s the problems which confront us in our daily worlds, that give us the drive and vision to look beyond the constraints to find the keys to success.

    Hindsight is a wonderful tool, though it can never help us to achieve, if we do not learn lessons. Every day should be filled with energy, passion, compassion, drive, hope, commitment, wisdom, truth, trust, gratitude, faith, love, patience, understanding, generosity, persistence, determination and self-belief.

    Never look back with regret, but always forward with optimism and hope. As long as we learn to like, love, respect and believe in ourselves, all things are possible. What others say about us has some importance in our lives: What we believe about ourselves is paramount to our growth and development.

    Take care.

    Kieran

  21. I have done these things most of my life and at 56 I am living ‘the icing on the cake’ – if I died this minute I got the ‘full bang for the buck’ so I highly agree! Smiles and best wishes, J William (Bill) Moore

  22. I have done these things most of my life and at 56 I am living ‘the icing on the cake’ – if I died this minute I got the ‘full bang for the buck’ so I highly agree! Smiles and best wishes, J William (Bill) Moore

  23. Thomas Cummins says:

    reflection is always perfect, and if everything could be done twice how sweet life would be. Unfortunately the dreams we have as kids are watered down to oblivion as so called educated adults aim our directions where they think it is best and often times or way too many times we read about those reaching mid life and deciding after a wake up call to awaken the dreams that have been dormant for way too long.
    Whatever our reflections may be when we reach 95 or older it is always beneficial to be instrumental in guiding our youth to live life to the fullest and perhaps the world will be more harmonious with less disassociated automatons drifting through to old age.
    This was an excellent article by Nandi Shastry and as usual John you bring quality to enlighten

  24. Thomas Cummins says:

    reflection is always perfect, and if everything could be done twice how sweet life would be. Unfortunately the dreams we have as kids are watered down to oblivion as so called educated adults aim our directions where they think it is best and often times or way too many times we read about those reaching mid life and deciding after a wake up call to awaken the dreams that have been dormant for way too long.
    Whatever our reflections may be when we reach 95 or older it is always beneficial to be instrumental in guiding our youth to live life to the fullest and perhaps the world will be more harmonious with less disassociated automatons drifting through to old age.
    This was an excellent article by Nandi Shastry and as usual John you bring quality to enlighten

  25. Lynda Tweed says:

    What wonderful messages from all three. I am 62 and can relate to all three! The thing I wouldn’t need to improve on, is the love I give to those in my life. If I should die today, they wouldn’t have to wonder if I loved them.

  26. Lynda Tweed says:

    What wonderful messages from all three. I am 62 and can relate to all three! The thing I wouldn’t need to improve on, is the love I give to those in my life. If I should die today, they wouldn’t have to wonder if I loved them.

  27. Karen Larson says:

    I’m a successful woman and have been semi retired since I was 55 yrs. Yes, I took risks, in every area of my life. I put family and friends first, then money, then things (a lot like Suze Orman, whom I admire very much). I’ll leave a legacy alright; I’ve produced CD’s for Spiritual growth, I’ve written a book on Spiritual growth and another book on how to make money. I’ll also leave Real Estate investments for my four grown children. So, if I were to die tomorrow, I’d be happy, with no regrets.

  28. Karen Larson says:

    I’m a successful woman and have been semi retired since I was 55 yrs. Yes, I took risks, in every area of my life. I put family and friends first, then money, then things (a lot like Suze Orman, whom I admire very much). I’ll leave a legacy alright; I’ve produced CD’s for Spiritual growth, I’ve written a book on Spiritual growth and another book on how to make money. I’ll also leave Real Estate investments for my four grown children. So, if I were to die tomorrow, I’d be happy, with no regrets.

  29. This is my first visit to this board. You all seem like a terrific group of people! I agree with Lynda. Although I have many regrets in life, if I should die, my wife and daughter will know that I loved them both with all my heart and soul.

  30. Hi John,

    Thanks for sharing 🙂

    Another book that’s similiar to this topic that I highly recommend is: “The Five Secrets You Must Discover before You Die” by Dr. John Izzo.

  31. Hi John,

    Thanks for sharing 🙂

    Another book that’s similiar to this topic that I highly recommend is: “The Five Secrets You Must Discover before You Die” by Dr. John Izzo.

  32. Hi John
    Within the last 2 years I have build two homebased business, written a free e-book, and started a coaching education. Why? because I reflect, risk more and want to do things that will outlast me. It all started with The Secret. Have a look at my free e-book launched in the same week as your latest book John.
    Have a nice and joyful day.
    Marie Louise, Denmark

  33. Hi John
    Within the last 2 years I have build two homebased business, written a free e-book, and started a coaching education. Why? because I reflect, risk more and want to do things that will outlast me. It all started with The Secret. Have a look at my free e-book launched in the same week as your latest book John.
    Have a nice and joyful day.
    Marie Louise, Denmark

  34. Hi John,
    “If you could live your life…”
    I am reminded of a series of interviews that I heard about 30 years ago on the radio.
    There was a very near air disaster when an aircraft plummeted thoudands of feet out of the sky before the pilots regained control. Most of those on board, during those minutes, thought they were going to dye. Several of the passengers were interviewed on landing and AGAIN six months later. Here’s the significant bit. Almost without exception everyone had these things in common.
    1). They had all adopted or deepened some spiritual / religous belief.
    2). They had regreted not having done more with their lives / taken more risks.
    3). They had all commited to varius things they had been saving for and putting off! From small conveniences to world cruises and the like.
    4). ‘Sod the kids – let’s have some fun!’
    Kind o’ makes you think doesn’t it?!
    Chris

  35. Hi All,
    First time on this blog.

    All of you seem very nice & have great points of view.

    Margaret’s right. If I knew then what I know today my life would be very different.

    To bad the secret didn’t come out years ago when I was younger. I’d be in a much different place today.

    It would have explained why I could do the things I could. Manifestation, but some where in life lost it.

    People caught on that I could manifest things, asked for help & I would always be there for them.

    I always loved helping people. In a way still do.

    BUT………………

    I’ll be 50 the end of this year, with some regrets & nothing to show for my life. Now I’m getting over my mistakes, moving on with no excusses.

    As for Karen talking about Suze Orman, I think Suze’s great, but have my own opinion on what she says.

    Meaning, put yourself first, than money, next family, than things & maybe friends.

    Why maybe friends, becaues as I’ve said, 50, regrets, nothing to show for my life, the so called friends came to me for help, answers & to do things for them all the time.

    When I’ve asked for help from them, which is a hard thing for me to do, they all were to busy & many reasons why they couldn’t be there for me to help.

    So now I’ve refused to help. Told them I have no more to give , nor have all the answers. That they must find out for themselves.

    Where are they today? No longer around.

    This is why I put myself first, have boundries, & refuse to help friends anymore.

    Some of you might think of this as being harsh, selfish, & manifested this in my life. Hey you might be right. If you have any opinions on this, I’m all ears.

    (my son pointed this out to me) I’ve always helped family & friends fist. they acheive their goals & than leave. He’s told me if I don’t put myself first I’ll always drop what I’m doing. Be there for everyone & never acheive my goals.

    My whole life I gave all from my heart & soul & never expected anything in return. Always helped people first. Myself second. In the process lost myself, my goals, dreams & much more.

    I don’t blame anyone for my actions & take 100% fault for all of it, but now have put up walls & boundries.

    So if I could live my life all over again: I’d put myself 1st.

  36. you all are right

  37. you all are right

  38. I’m 70, getting younger…. all the great teachers have said, one way or another, “Look after No.1 first.” It goes from me looking after me first, and my partner looking after herself first, then as a couple, we look after our couple together first, then the family ……. then community, parish, county, country and so on. As a soldier I would have to look out for myself so basically I’m alive to looking out for my mates, and so on. It’s not selfishness, it’s sense.As you found out, spread yourself too thin, you begin to tear! Have a wonderful day, Luv Ya All, Justin

  39. I’m 70, getting younger…. all the great teachers have said, one way or another, “Look after No.1 first.” It goes from me looking after me first, and my partner looking after herself first, then as a couple, we look after our couple together first, then the family ……. then community, parish, county, country and so on. As a soldier I would have to look out for myself so basically I’m alive to looking out for my mates, and so on. It’s not selfishness, it’s sense.As you found out, spread yourself too thin, you begin to tear! Have a wonderful day, Luv Ya All, Justin

  40. Hi All & Justin,
    Thanks for answering.
    I feel much better, and your right.
    I have spread myself thin & torn apart.
    love to all
    Bee

  41. Hi All & Justin,
    Thanks for answering.
    I feel much better, and your right.
    I have spread myself thin & torn apart.
    love to all
    Bee

  42. John Assaraf says:

    Glad you all liked this so much! Thanks NAN

  43. John Assaraf says:

    Glad you all liked this so much! Thanks NAN

  44. great thoughts

  45. great thoughts

  46. I have read a lot of stories, tips, quotes about life and living it to the fullest and this one stands out. Others say that one of the hardest questions in life is about “life” itself and how to have it to the full but if we think of it deeply it will only come down to one thing “choice”. Living life to the fullest is a choice. We live the way we want it if we chose to. Some of us are just complicating life. Great post. More power to you.

Trackbacks

  1. […] The collective experience of 50 people aged 95 or older and what they would do differently were they to have the opportunity to live life over. They would; […]